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Frustrated Dreams?

Yesterday I was brought to tears by a simple Facebook Messenger exchange which actually started out as ME sending something funny to a friend to cheer HER up!  The conversation moved past the funniness and she was asking me about my plans for when my boss retires.

 I've played that over and over in my head and still don't have a definite answer for that.  I do know God knows my needs and when they'll be needed so I'm not very worried about it right now.  But, I told her that I do know that I never set out for my job as an assistant to be permanent.  It was a temporary job that just ended up heading into 12+ years!  I also told her I don't think I ever became what I thought I'd grow up to be!

 She asked does anyone really?

 I know how I got to this job is NOT what I expected for myself.  Let's see...As a younger girl, I would often say I would be a teacher when I grew up.  At some point, that changed and up until I was somewhere in Junior High, I was going to be the first female umpire in the MLB.  I grew up watching baseball and thought it needed more women involved!  In High School, I began to think full time ministry was where I'd head much to the chagrin of my English teacher at my tiny Baptist school who didn't think women belonged pastoring.  (Yeah, we might have butt heads on this topic and there was at least one paper written by me arguing my point!)  After I graduated, I was unsure where I was heading so I ended up working at Hallmark and then Party Works, the later I ended up purchasing and running for 7 years.  And, of course, I've always wanted to be a writer. 

 So, I told her I guess I never fit into one box.

 Then she brought me to tears.  She said she wanted to remind me that I AM a writer because I spread the word about Jesus daily, that I AM like a pastor as I guide others, and I probably AM an armchair umpire while watching baseball!  She then said that I AM living my dreams, just not necessarily earning a paycheck from them.

 What are you dreaming about becoming?  I realized that I've already become what I was dreaming, but I needed different lenses to see it.

 The world wants to tell us we're not talented enough, we need more money or education, we're not fit enough, we're not beautiful enough, we're not....we're not....we're not.

 But, by this little conversation, I was reminded this week that I AM...I am because HE IS.  God is the one who puts dreams in my hearts.  He provides ways to see those dreams come to fruition.  The world wants me to fit in their little box they've created.  But, I don't fit in one.  I live in His Word which opens up eternal life!  No box needed for that. ❤

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